Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Its a....

Let me rephrase. Its another girl!! I realized its been crazy long since I checked my blog feed. And what do I see, but two other bloggers also just announced that they are having girls!! 'Tis the season for pretty frocks, lots of sparkle and pink bows.

With our first, I had convinced myself it was a boy, just because I wanted to be prepared to handle the disappointment, just in case it was indeed a boy. I was super excited to learn it was a girl, since that is how I always pictured my life - married with two girls. Its probably because I have a sister and I am so close to her.

This time around, I was somewhat neutral about the gender. Yes, still slightly biased towards a girl, but a boy was absolutely ok too (not that it wouldn't have been ok the first time, of course it would have been fine!). I was more concerned about the anatomy part of the scan - is the heart ok? Does he/she have 10 fingers and toes? Then the tech told us it was a girl, and hubby and I looked at each other smiling. Great, we don't have to invest in a whole new wardrobe. Deep down though, I had this teeny been itsy bitsy niggle - a boy would have been nice too. Maybe its because we don't plan to have any more kids, so I know its two girls and we are done. So I will never know what it feels like to be the mother of a boy. Does that make sense? It was a strange feeling, especially because I had never pictured myself ever as a mother of a boy. No wonder Gautam Buddha calls desire the cause of suffering.

I am once again loving the squirms, kicks, hiccups and all things baby inside of me. I can't believe I have only 15 more weeks or so of experiencing this lovely miracle of what will probably be my last ever pregnancy. Its hard letting go...knowing that I may never experience these feelings ever again.

Meanwhile, I am research and reading up as much as I can about natural child birth. No I am not a crunchy mama. I dare not take an epidural because I am so scared it will bring on all the complications it did for my last pregnancy, so I am trying to be prepared for pain-relief free labor.

If anyone has any insights on hypnobabies, do let me know.

1 comment:

  1. Water was a great pain reliever for me, highly recommend it but I guess you have to be a bit of a waterbaby yourself for it to be right for you. I also used the natal hypnotherapy cds, the definitely helped me relax during pregnancy but not sure Iused any of the tehcniques during labour as there just didnt seem time. I just did my own thing in the water but then the mind set from the cds may have helped to keep me generally calm? Who knows? :-)